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Knowledge I have gained from my wife today.

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Subversive Bucolicism

Posts: 9235

Joined: Sat Mar 13, 2004 10:47 pm

Location: I think I hear a Dingo eating your Baby

Post Sun Dec 31, 2017 11:17 pm

Knowledge I have gained from my wife today.

1 Plush baby Tigers don't have bones.
2 You can't smuggle pigeons strapped to your legs.
3 A Haggis is not a bomb.
4 You have to sedate Humming Birds if you try to smuggle them in your jocks as they are annoying.
5 180,000 pounds of chicken wings where bought in from the Netherlands to Malaysia and not claimed, they where buried only to have people dig them up. (I'm checking Snopes on this one lol)
6 200 Tarantulas where smuggled into South Africa from Peru.
7 10 Human eye balls were smuggled into London Airport Port in a Jam jar.

Seriously!!! how could I live without this, Planks Constant and the Josephson effect pales into insignificance. Schrödinger get your Cat out of the box and take note.
Workplace Safety :
Destroying our forests one Take 5 at a time.

Every time you do a Take 5 an Orangutan cries.


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Posts: 2018

Joined: Fri Aug 26, 2005 4:28 pm

Location: Melbourne

Post Thu Jan 18, 2018 4:04 pm

Re: Knowledge I have gained from my wife today.

Can you send me some of whatever it is your wife is on, my head hurts. :finger:
My friends aren't holding me back..... I'm pulling 'em forward.


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God of Athiests

Posts: 8498

Joined: Thu Aug 07, 2003 2:14 am

Location: Drownsville if not Brownsville

Post Thu Jan 18, 2018 4:22 pm

Re: Knowledge I have gained from my wife today.

Knowledge I gained from my grandfather before he died:

Don't trust a fart.
Don't waste an erection.
Don't take laxatives and sleeping tablets at the same time.

Wise words.
George Carlin, an American Comedian said; "Think of how stupid the average person is, and realise that half of them are stupider than that".

Foo on patrol

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Posts: 1241

Joined: Fri Mar 20, 2009 10:09 am

Location: Sandstone Point

Post Fri Jan 19, 2018 10:28 am

Re: Knowledge I have gained from my wife today.

^^^ :armsup: :armsup: :armsup: :armsup: :rofl: :rofl: ^^^


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