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JOKES THAT MAKE YOU GROAN....

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Ezookiel

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Post Fri Apr 20, 2007 7:46 pm

JOKES THAT MAKE YOU GROAN....

A research group was engaged in a study of longevity in mammals and had recently focused their attention on a particular species of porpoise, which they studied from their floating laboratory off the coast of Baja Mexico. They came to believe that, if fed just the right combination of nutrients, this particular porpoise could, in theory, live forever.

To put this to the test, they studied the world's flora and fauna to see if any naturally occurring organism would fit the bill. They finally narrowed the selection down to an unusual species of mynah bird, and they sent a team of researchers off to gather a specimen.

It turns out that the mynah bird in question was quite rare, living only in a single tree in Kenya. The research team finally arrived at the tree to capture a bird, only to find that the tree was surrounded by a pride of very hungry lions, precluding any reasonable attempt to approach and climb the tree.

A suggestion was made that the lions might be manageable if they could be fed, and a couple of fat cape buffalo were captured and offered to the lions. The hungry lions devoured the hapless beasts and lay down upon the grass to digest their meal.

One of the researchers then gingerly tiptoed past the lions, climbed the tree, and had little difficulty capturing one of the mynah birds. He climbed back down the tree and walked past the lions to rejoin the group when a game warden appeared and arrested him for (what else)...

"Transporting mynahs across sedate lions for immortal porpoises."
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Squik

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Post Fri Apr 20, 2007 7:48 pm

ha..... ahhh.... ummm..... yeah :?
DRS smells like a cat-food milkshake... and wet socks... and gorgonzola cheese... all whizzed up in a blender
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MrsForby

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Post Fri Apr 20, 2007 7:52 pm

*groan*
WICKED wrote:I flogged mine for a good hour this arvo!


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plowy

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Post Fri Apr 20, 2007 7:54 pm

why did the koala bear fall out of the tree

















































because it was dead :finger:
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Squik

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Post Fri Apr 20, 2007 7:56 pm

What killed the dingo?



















































The koala fell on it :D
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MrsForby

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Post Fri Apr 20, 2007 7:57 pm

oh oh oh I got one!!!

Whats yellow and goes "ha ha ha" *plop*



























































A Duck laughing it's head off. :finger:
WICKED wrote:I flogged mine for a good hour this arvo!


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Turoa

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Post Fri Apr 20, 2007 8:03 pm

MissForbyNoob wrote:oh oh oh I got one!!!

Whats yellow and goes "ha ha ha" *plop*

A Duck laughing it's head off. :finger:


Ducks arent yellow :finger:
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MrsForby

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Post Fri Apr 20, 2007 8:04 pm

Turoa wrote:
MissForbyNoob wrote:oh oh oh I got one!!!

Whats yellow and goes "ha ha ha" *plop*

A Duck laughing it's head off. :finger:


Ducks arent yellow :finger:


Shoooooosh....

Baby ones are... Or so Kleenex tells us...
WICKED wrote:I flogged mine for a good hour this arvo!


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justmud

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Post Fri Apr 20, 2007 8:18 pm

edited..... at this point in time, it's in very poor taste. Americans read this site too.
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MrsForby

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Post Fri Apr 20, 2007 8:19 pm

justmud wrote: see above post


I recieved this joke 5 TIMES today!!!

OVER IT...

hang on


*groan*

Thats better
WICKED wrote:I flogged mine for a good hour this arvo!


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Ezookiel

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Post Fri Apr 20, 2007 8:25 pm

My joke is in poor taste????

Huh?
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justmud

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Post Fri Apr 20, 2007 8:27 pm

Sorry :oops:
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Weiner

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Post Fri Apr 20, 2007 8:30 pm

Why did Sally fall off the swing?













































Cause she had no arms
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Weiner

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Post Fri Apr 20, 2007 8:30 pm

Why couldn't Sally drive?













































Cause she was a woman :armsup:
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Ezookiel

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Post Fri Apr 20, 2007 8:52 pm

Weiner wrote:Why couldn't Sally drive?

Cause she was a woman :armsup:


Oooh, can't wait to see MFN's response to this joke.

I am slowly becoming lost in this thread. I assume someone posted, then removed a joke? Either that or MFN got my joke 5 times in an email, which I think pretty unlikely.

Oh well, I'm easily confused anyway.
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plowy

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Post Fri Apr 20, 2007 9:03 pm

whats white n yellow n sits at the bottom of the pool






















































a baby with its floatys slashed :lol:
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ofr57

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Post Fri Apr 20, 2007 9:07 pm

plowy wrote:whats white n yellow n sits at the bottom of the pool

a baby with its floatys slashed :lol:


:rofl: :armsup:
Vote Earth
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MrsForby

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Post Fri Apr 20, 2007 9:09 pm

I'm ignoring ti E-Zook... I'll outdrive him one day...

What did the nurse say to the dingo in the Maternity Ward?





Eat here or Take away? :D
WICKED wrote:I flogged mine for a good hour this arvo!


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chops

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Post Fri Apr 20, 2007 9:17 pm

what's long and hard and f*cks new zealanders?

























































grade 3 :finger:
1988 351W GQ wagon
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plowy

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Post Fri Apr 20, 2007 9:44 pm

[quote="crunch"]OK, this is possibly the worst "joke" I've ever heard. It is in poor taste and I'd advise any that are easily offended not to read it.

OK, warnings aside, if you're still reading, you're not easily offended, or just to








Warning










Warning












Warning











"Joke" coming











Gee, you really are sick

hear is worse last time i did these 2 i upset qld then the vic's

1
how do u stop a dog humping your leg ?

suck it off

2
whats the difference between menstrual blood n sand ?

you can't gargle sand


3
why do women find it hard to pee in the mornin ?


ever tried to pull apart a grilled cheese sandwich :D
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crunch

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Post Fri Apr 20, 2007 10:36 pm

That got deleted? Holy crap thats old.












And you get to laugh at re-tards :D (C'mon, don't have a dig at me, you all know that you do it behind closed doors)
I don't know about Phil, but if I had 15 guys following me around all day, I reckon I'd fell like a cigarette!

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chimpboy

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Post Fri Apr 20, 2007 10:44 pm

That's a shocker barnsey.
This is not legal advice.
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GQ Bear

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Post Fri Apr 20, 2007 10:50 pm

Another oldie


OK Lorraine Bobbit's driving down the road just after severing John's knob off. She tosses the severed member out the window just as two old dears are driving the opposite direction. It hits their windscreen and bounces off.

Mavis turns to Beryl and says (in granny voice) "Geez Beryl, did ya see the size of the c**k on that grasshopper?"
GO STORM
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NAV05

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Post Fri Apr 20, 2007 11:28 pm

:lol: What does a Hindu ?

































Lays eggs bro !
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Hof

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Post Fri Apr 20, 2007 11:54 pm

Might be a bit slow but me and the misses both don't get the Mal Meninga joke..

I know its sad but someone explain!!!
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Gribble

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Post Sat Apr 21, 2007 12:01 am

plowy wrote:whats white n yellow n sits at the bottom of the pool

a baby with its floatys slashed :lol:


Whats white, red and yellow and floats at the top of the pool?


A slashed baby with floaties. :D
\m/
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Gribble

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Post Sat Apr 21, 2007 12:02 am

Hof wrote:Might be a bit slow but me and the misses both don't get the Mal Meninga joke..

I know its sad but someone explain!!!


Ive got a joke that will go with your avatar,,,,,

What do you call 1000 cows in a paddock masturbating? :D
\m/
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plowy

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Post Sat Apr 21, 2007 12:07 am

another very poor taste one removed........





[/i]
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Gribble

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Post Sat Apr 21, 2007 12:09 am

Why did Billy crash his bike?

Billy is a dolphin.


Why did Steve crash his bike?

Someone threw a fridge at him.


Whats black, white and red and sits in a tree?

A magpie with a fat.


Why didnt the cat eat its dinner?

Its ears were nailgunned to floor.


Why couldnt the cat turn around in the hall?

It had a javelin through its head.


How do you make sure a cat with 9 lives dies when its run over?

One side of an 18 wheeler semi.


Ill stop now......
\m/
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Gribble

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Post Sat Apr 21, 2007 12:10 am

plowy wrote:poor taste removed


:D
\m/
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